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Chili Lime Guacamole that saved our marriage!

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    If it's true that the way to a mans heart is through his stomach, then this story has meaning. Let me tell you what I was feeling one day just before I wrote this article.

    My wife was just being herself, nothing unusual, not complaining, not yelling at me or anything untoward at all. But somehow I wasn't satisfied. Something was wrong with the way I was relating to my wife. Perhaps you've heard about the differences in the way that men and women think? I was being very detailed, saying what I meant, saying it once and expecting her to "get it" as soon as I said something. But, that day I was feeling like "talking to a wall" would have been easier. And my wife (bless her heart!) could tell that I was getting very tense.

    Being the sweet and good woman that she is, my wife made some food for me! Now, I'm not saying this is the best thing to do all the time, but she understood my needs very well just then. She decided that I needed not words (which weren't working anyway), but a physical act of love to make me feel better. See how sweet she is? I was at fault, but she was trying to fix the problem!

    Oh, God bless her! She's got such a compassionate soul. And she's one heck-uv-a good cook too! With a little bit of thought, she whipped up some guacamole and served it to me right away with fresh tortilla chips. (No, she didn't make the chips herself this time, she just bought a good local brand in San Diego here.) The guacamole was served to me on the couch, within minutes of mashing the avocados. There wasn't even any time for the flavors to marinate into the avocado base. Usually we like to let the mix set for a half an hour to a full hour in the fridge if we can. That lets the flavors sink into the plain avocado mash and gives it a certain "authentic" kind of flavor. But this time she served it right away and I wasn't expecting it to taste any better than a normal "good" on the scale.

    Wow was I surprised! Her Chili Lime Guacamole was fantastic right out of the mixing bowl! Now let me tell you something about avocado dip- if it's just been mixed, the flavors are all quite distinct and separated from each other. The tomato flavor hits one part of your tongue, the chopped onions sting another part of your mouth, and the avocados have a green taste. If you forget to put in salt, the whole thing really tastes like you put a spoonful of each different ingredient into your mouth all at once. It's good, but not a "10" on the scale.

    THIS one was SO GOOD, it was FANTASTIC! I literally salivated for my second bite. I couldn't get enough of it, I was breaking the chips against my lips, hastily pushing the avocado dip into my mouth as fast as I could. My jaw got sore chewing on the chips at high speed. No kidding! And more importantly, NOW I REALLY FELT RESPECTED AGAIN! (Ladies take note, your man likes to feel respected.) I hate to admit this, but I was moved to apologize to my wife, not because I should have done it, but because she respected me unconditionally and won me with a loving act of respect. I was ashamed of myself because I knew that she hadn't done anything wrong, and the frustration I was feeling about our lack of communication was really my fault for not listening to her better. So there I was, sitting next to her on the couch, and feeling like a king with a bowl of guacamole in my lap, stuffing chips into my mouth rapid-fire... and realizing that I needed to tell her I was wrong.

    Those three little words in the English language are so important. Not the ones you might expect- "I love you," but the other three that are so hard to give voice to- "I was wrong." Gentlemen, let me stress this again for you. "Honey, I was wrong, you didn't do anything wrong, and I forgive you. Please forgive me for being selfish, I love you." That couple of sentences can do wonders for your marriage when your wife is trying to show you that she loves and respects you. Practice it aloud with me now- "I was wrong." Don't worry about looking silly, just imagine how I looked with a bowl of green mush in my lap when I apologized to my beautiful wife! You can't look any sillier than I did. It's true!

    We shared that bowl of avocado dip, munched on chips and dip together, and renewed our love for each other. The lime juice acts like a secret ingredient, like a chemical catalyst, something that's so full of zing that you wonder how you ever made guacamole without it before. I say that the lime juice gave it zing and that's true, but the subtle mixing of the flavors was like a flavor background of the smell of a campfire with bacon cooking on it. But never fear, if you're a vegetarian this dip is still "Kosher" for you. There isn't any bacon or smoke flavoring in this recipe. It's all accomplished with an exact amount of each ingredient. This can be reproduced by just about anybody, it's that easy!

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